It is all well, I started internship at International Flavors and Fragrances (IFF for short), with a good supervisor and a lively bunch of colleagues.

Although my previous problems haven't been solved and my heart is still heavy from guilt, I wonder... Is the blame on both parties or just on me?

My conclusion was simple, it was me and me alone. If anyone was to pin point all faults, they would need lots of pins.

I knew this all along, and i feel guilty for it. I want to apologize but she wouldn't let me. Everyday I wake up with a heavy hard that serves as a reminder of my cold deeds.

Mylene, I just want you to know that I'm truly sorry for whatever that I've done. You have no idea what I'm willing to sacrifice/pay to turn back time and stop those things. Even more so what I would do for you to have a chance to apologize like a man, face to face, heart to heart. That is if I have one.

It is horrible without you in my life. Every single free time I have, my mind will dwell upon you, then on my acts. My friends continuously fail my trust and companionship, and I need someone to confide to. You are the best person! I remember those times... those times where we talked freely to one another. I remember that you would always be understanding and non-judgmental on serious issues such as this. Maybe this thing has caused a judgement to be made by you, on me.

Who can I sulk to?
Who can I blame?
Who will undo
My wretched deeds.

If time fails to heal the wounds of my heart,
then I hope that my sincerity will.

I have wronged and I have repented. Now I need your forgiveness.